The “Water Cooler” is a feature on Claycord.com where we ask you a question or provide a topic, and you talk about it.
The “Water Cooler” will be up Monday-Friday in the noon hour.
QUESTION: On a scale of 1-10, how strict were your parents?
Talk about it….
My mother had a favorite. A wooden spoon. When I was younger she used it often. Then she calmed down about the third grade. My father would sit you down and calmly say, “you know right from wrong so do things right”. That’s it no punishment. If ten is tough maybe a 6. We did have jobs that had to be done. You couldn’t get out of them.
Very fortunate to have been blessed with level headed children. Sure there were issues but nothing compared to some. All grown and active in the work force now. Also blessed with intelligent grand children as well. I’d say a 5 if I have to label it.
Depended on how tired she was after work and how annoying we were. Must say, she really let me have when I put a live mouse in her purse.
6.5
Funny all the other kids around us that were raised either really liberal or really strict all kind of went wacko. I guess middle of the roads the best
They taught by the example of their own behavior, so they were strict without having to be physically or verbally abusive. Their (and the school’s) rules seemed reasonable, so I followed them.
…father 9 – mother 6…. average of today’s parents imho – 3
I totally misread the question. My parents were not strict at all. Always let me make my own decisions but would always suggest and I listened.
My Dad, was about a 6. He was a nice guy and a great father, but he wouldn’t let me get away with misbehaving. He never hit me, but he would give me a stern talking to. He’d explain in language a kid could understand why what I did was wrong, and he’d ground me if he felt it was necessary. When I was a teenager, I would bring home what he perceived as trampy girls, and he would always tell me how I could do much better. He was right, of course, so I started dating nicer girls and met my wife when I was in my senior year.
My Mom was a zero. She never got angry, and nothing ever annoyed her. Mom liked all our friends, and all our friends liked her. But it was my Mom who taught me how to be courteous, and respect my elders, always say, “thank you,” and be polite to people even if I don’t know them.
Dawg! Trampy girls were great… you work your way up to a really nice girl and after your parents give a thumbs up & your friends are impressed…. you spend a fortune on her… then you find out she’s a trampy girl too.
Some just fake it better than others.
Remember the old Benny Hill gag where he offers a woman $500 to sleep with him and she says $500.?…. well, I don’t know…”
and Benny says “How’s about $100 ?”
The woman says ” $100 ? what kind of a girl do you think I am?”
Benny says “We’ve already determined that, now we’re just haggling over the price!”
Not sure about the scale. I was an only child (adopted) of older parents (35 and 40 when l was adopted). So my parents were pretty protective of me. When l finished school and
started to work in the town about 10 miles from my house, l started to date and go to clubs and parties. However my parents had it easy I’m some ways, no drugs, nobody had a car, and because l lived outside town l had to take the train, last train was 12:30, so they didn’t have to worry about a curfew. When l turned 18 and still living at home, they surprised me big time by letting me know that now l was an adult and l could come and go as l pleased, they wouldn’t ask me where l had been, who l had been with or
when l was coming home. The years from 1967 to early seventies, when l was an au pair and later living in New York City, l was a lot more wild, and then there were drugs, but l never got into the drug scene, although l did experiment a little, my parents would not have approved of my lifestyle then, but they were back in Denmark. We did drink a fair amount, fortunately living in NYC nobody needed to drive
My mother was the disciplinarian in our family and I would rate her an 8.5–she was spread thin with 8 children to rear while my father worked swing shift to provide for us. Corporal punishments consisted of spankings, belt, and once even a broom! I will never forget the time she asked us to stop playing with a guitar, as we were giving her a headache…after several requests, she grabbed the instrument and stomped it to pieces! Needless to say, I turned out to be a fine adult…
One time I was trying to get away from a couple of whacks on the rear from a wooden spoon so I went under my bed. Big mistake, my mother got the broom and started poking me with the broom handle. When I got older all of these things were amusing to look back at. I was never really hurt.
You just jogged my memory…every spank on my behind coincided with every syllable to the phrase, “No ande haciendo eso!”–lucky for me it was short. I’m smiling as I’m remembering my mother…
For myself, level… 12.5. Roman Catholic Sicilian Family.
My 3 brothers’ level 3. My baby sister, level 0.
Roz, That doesn’t sound fair. I always wanted a brother or sister until my best friends younger siblings always bothered us when we playing. Then l was glad l was an only child. As a teenager l thought having an older brother would be cool, he could bring all the cute guys home.
Hanne, that’s what was so great about having a sister, she had beautiful friends. When my parents would go out for an evening, she’d invite some of her friends to come over. I’d call some of my friends, and they’d come over, and we would have a party. It was fun until my Dad discovered some booze was missing from the liquor cabinet. We were grounded for a month.
8
I couldn’t get away with anything. Eventually, I didn’t try any longer.
I miss them.
It is hard to say. In some things they were “strict”. We always went to church every Sunday if we were in town. We never got gifts from my parents except on birthdays and Christmas. At some point we were expected to buy our own clothes. We had assigned chores and got a rudimentary allowance (like $0.75 per week). I only remember getting the belt once. It isn’t that they were slow to punish but we didn’t push the envelope. But they were also supportive in teaching us the value of work and money. I had my first paper route at 13. My parents set me up with a savings account and a few years later I rolled my paper route money into a CD paying 12% interest. They also gave me a credit card when I was a junior or senior in high school so that I could begin building a credit record. I didn’t abuse their trust and used the card only for things for which I had the money to pay.
Maybe my parents rate a 7-8 but in a good way.
10 being tough. My mom was a widow at 46 with 3 girls & 9 boys. She never remarried. She was very strict. I remember mom beating the crap of one of my brothers for getting his girlfriend pregnant at the age of 17. I remember mom telling my sister she cannot go to any high school dances. When I was in high school she beat the crap out of me for coming home high. My mom was so strict she made sure we come home from school after 3pm, do our homework and chores, and before any of us come inside the house, we have to take off our shoes. She was indeed a strict mom. She even made sure that we change out of our school clothes into our house clothes, which I never understood the reason behind it. I give her props for raising 12 children by herself. May she RIP. She would have been 98 this year.
Your mom was a real trooper. Good for her.
@Medrex,
Your Mom should have been awarded a Medal of Honor of the Highest Rank. How on earth did she manage? God Bless and may she RIP.
WDG
7.3779
My mom raised me as well as she could while working very long hours in medical facilities. She said to me in early times that she had to be very strict because she had to be both the mother and the father. At times I would say then and now that she overdid it. On a scale of one to ten she could sometimes be a twelve.
My mother for the most part was very sweet, she could get mad, and when as a teenager I got fresh she would raise her hand like she was going to hit me, but she never did. She could lose her temper, whereas my dad was more deliberate. She did install some practical advice that I have followed, don’t leave the house with spots on your clothes, wrinkled clothes and shoes not shined. Unfortunately, I have not been as successful to install same in my daughter, although she is very clean, I doubt she ever has shined shoes. She would also tell me you have to suffer to be beautiful, this was back when we slept with our hair in rollers, Aw and wore pointed shoes.
Oh Hanne, those awful torture devices! I was somewhat lucky in that we learned fairly early on that my mom could use whatever curlers on me or I could wear rollers for days and my hair only stayed curly for five minutes, so I escaped a lot of those headaches.
@Medrex
Definitely the first thing we had to do after we got home from church or school was change our clothes.
I was born and raised down in Alabama
On a farm way back up in the woods
I was so ragged that folks used to call me Patches
Papa used to tease me about it
‘Cause deep down inside he was hurt
‘Cause he’d done all he could
My papa was a great old man
I can see him with a shovel in his hands, see
Education he never had
He did wonders when the times got bad
The little money from the crops he raised
Barely paid the bills we made
For, life had kick him down to the ground
When he tried to get up
Life would kick him back down
One day Papa called me to his dyin’ bed
Put his hands on my shoulders
And in his tears he said
He said, Patches
I’m dependin’ on you, son
To pull the family through
My son, it’s all left up to you
Two days later Papa passed away, and
I became a man that day
So I told Mama I was gonna quit school, but
She said that was Daddy’s strictest rule
So every mornin’ ‘fore I went to school
I fed the chickens and I chopped wood too
Sometimes I felt that I couldn’t go on
I wanted to leave, just run away from home
But I would remember what my daddy said
With tears in his eyes on his dyin’ bed
He said, Patches
I’m dependin’ on you, son
I tried to do my best
It’s up to you to do the rest
Then one day a strong rain came
And washed all the crops away
And at the age of 13 I thought
I was carryin’ the weight of the
Whole world on my shoulders
And you know, Mama knew
What I was goin’ through, ’cause
Every day I had to work the fields
‘Cause that’s the only way we got our meals
You see, I was the oldest of the family
And everybody else depended on me
Every night I heard my Mama pray
Lord, give him the strength to make another day
So years have passed and all the kids are grown
The angels took Mama to a brand new home
Lord knows, people, I shedded tears
But my daddy’s voice kept me through the years
Sing,
Patches, I’m dependin’ on you, son
To pull the family through
My son, it’s all left up to you
Oh, I can still hear Papa’s voice sayin’
Patches, I’m dependin’ on you, son
I’ve tried to do my best
It’s up to you to do the rest
I can still hear Papa, what he said
Patches, I’m dependin’ on you, son
To pull the family through
My son, it’s all left up to you
Belts … Hotwheel tracks … hard core beat downs for the most serious mistakes … all just old hat to me honey … Hungarian-Polish parents … 2nd generation in USA.
Gentle parenting was unheard of in my parents home. I moved out when I was 17 years old and still in high school.