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Home » The Water Cooler – Bullying In Schools

The Water Cooler – Bullying In Schools

by CLAYCORD.com
42 comments

The “Water Cooler” is a feature on Claycord.com where we ask you a question or provide a topic, and you talk about it.

The “Water Cooler” will be up Monday-Friday at noon.

Today’s question:

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QUESTION: Has your child (or a child you know) ever been bullied in school? If so, do you feel like the school’s administration did a good job taking care of the problem? (you can name the school, but please, no names of people involved).

Talk about it.

42 comments


ConcordRez March 11, 2020 - 12:19 PM - 12:19 PM

I have been working as a substitute teacher in the MDUSD, off and on, since 2003. I would like to share that the students at Ygnacio Valley High School are so very, very kind to the students in the special needs communities, greeting them as they pass the buses and ignoring the loud noises sometimes voiced by the latter population.

Aunt Barbara March 11, 2020 - 3:54 PM - 3:54 PM

My nephew ended up going to YV after being bullied and treated poorly at Northgate.
No problems at YV and students were also polite to parents in the parking lots, which was a huge problem at entitled Northgate..

.

Silva March 11, 2020 - 7:35 PM - 7:35 PM

Aw, bless them, the sweety pies!

S March 11, 2020 - 12:30 PM - 12:30 PM

With the restrictions placed on schools for discipline; Bullying can be difficult to address. Positive Intervention is a huge failure.

Mika March 11, 2020 - 1:45 PM - 1:45 PM

Agree with you 100%.

RANDOM TASK March 11, 2020 - 12:43 PM - 12:43 PM

ok here we go

I am sure it happens ….yet 90 % of the time it is something they get from their parents

as a lot of parents are displaying by acting out against potus because he has funny hair or won the election or is being falsely accused or being accused again …..and again ….and yet again

not a fan of politics but lets put the blame where it belongs

yes some kids a few are just mean

but most get it from their parents and pass it on
like followers of a political party get in line to throw stones at who ever they are supposed to hate

the democrat platform of anti bullying and hate is so hypocritical when they portray hate daily ….instead of demanding change through the means available or asking questions they act out like well school children
and demonstrate their lack of vision and clarity and education perhaps

children always represent the pillars of society …..their parents

so lets place blame where it belongs of we are throwing stones again

use your brain not your mouth

boats and soda pop

ConcordKate March 11, 2020 - 1:39 PM - 1:39 PM

Hey Random – if you are not going to address the question and just rant about politics, please consider posting to the local politics thread. This question is about bullying children in schools and how the school’s administration handled the incidents. My child was bullied in school and it was horrible. not in this school district, I might add. The administration at that school did nothing about it during the middle and high school years that the bullying occurred. My child was traumatized for quite a while.

CS March 11, 2020 - 2:00 PM - 2:00 PM

How did you manage to turn a question about bullying into a political rant… I genuinely do not understand anymore

Silva March 11, 2020 - 7:36 PM - 7:36 PM

I think it’s his job or something.

Rod Barton March 11, 2020 - 12:46 PM - 12:46 PM

Unfortunately bullying is a sad epidemic of our society due to incompetent parenting. I have been a victim and know many others who have been victims to bullying as well. The only advise for any child dealing with this issue is to stand up and fight back against bullies. School officials (aka paper pushers) are useless in these cases. Enroll your child in karate classes to deal with these issues and defend themselves.

Aunt Barbara March 11, 2020 - 3:56 PM - 3:56 PM

bulllies have the lowest self esteem AND ISSUES

S March 11, 2020 - 7:50 PM - 7:50 PM

low self esteem and issues is not an excuse

Concernicus March 12, 2020 - 3:46 PM - 3:46 PM

Low self esteem and issues is not an excuse, it’s a cause. If you want to treat the problem, you go after the cause, not the symptoms. Simply expecting better behavior out of others is obviously not going to work. Address the bully, and the bullying will stop.

In my experience, it definitely has a lot to do with their home life.

ON DA March 11, 2020 - 12:49 PM - 12:49 PM

There are several techniques today that are still employed, tested and effective.

I may not be able to list them here. For those families and friends that still suffer from this plague, seek professional guidance and help because the solution may be just right around the next corner.

WC Resident March 11, 2020 - 3:31 PM - 3:31 PM

BS – if there are techniques that are tested and effective then list them and cite your sources. A true professional can and will easily do this.

ON DA March 11, 2020 - 7:10 PM - 7:10 PM

Just like yourself WC Resident…You ARE THE BS.

Anonymous March 11, 2020 - 1:09 PM - 1:09 PM

So, it’s uncool to smash bullies like the old days? It seemed to work for us.

SKS March 11, 2020 - 1:28 PM - 1:28 PM

The only effective solution to bullying – proven over and over – is to teach kids to speak up when they see someone being bullied. Counseling the bully or the victim works in that moment. But only when PEERS say, “hey, it’s not cool to talk like that” does anything change. Peers need to support their friends and call bullies out.

Dunbar March 11, 2020 - 1:46 PM - 1:46 PM

Bullying is essential. It builds character.

Mutts March 11, 2020 - 2:32 PM - 2:32 PM

Call it what it is. If it’s ongoing then it’s harassment. Illegal.

Original G March 11, 2020 - 2:34 PM - 2:34 PM

So different, now that the world has spawned an overabundance of pursuers of emergency medical transport vehicles. Back in late 1960s, solved bully problem in high school with a single punch to a nose.

FBR March 11, 2020 - 2:34 PM - 2:34 PM

I think the bully kid should be allowed to be confronted by the victim kid’s parents. The bullier might have some idea of what intimidation is from the victim’s standpoint might be.

Cowellian March 11, 2020 - 2:38 PM - 2:38 PM

And what do you do about the bullies who claim to be victims of bullying when they get called out for their bad actions?

ON DA March 11, 2020 - 7:11 PM - 7:11 PM

You may not want to know the answer to that one Cowee.

Concernicus March 12, 2020 - 3:49 PM - 3:49 PM

Chances are not absolute zero that they DIDN’T learn it from somewhere.

Atticus Thraxx March 11, 2020 - 4:04 PM - 4:04 PM

No. We were fortunate in that our kids were able to deflect or ignore what little bullying did come their way. I understand not every kid enjoys that confidence and it sucks. People are terrible sometimes.
#destroyallrobots

KingOfC March 11, 2020 - 4:07 PM - 4:07 PM

Growing up I was a victim of bullying here and there, I also was the one who stuck up for other kids being bullied, now a days bullying is at an all time high, to the point where I ask my Son weekly if the kids are being nice to him and he always says it’s all good, I do believe him. There are kids out there unfortunately afraid to tell their parents because they are afraid of being a “snitch”. I will soon start a movement in my City to help this unfortunate pattern of bullying decrease, its time to Stand Up and Speak out!

chuckie the troll March 11, 2020 - 4:26 PM - 4:26 PM

Son was bullied. Principal had our son and the perpetrators sign a sheet that they wouldn’t bully people. Bullies then threatened my son. Placed him in private school, didn’t even bother to pick up the school photos we had paid for. Our son received a better education, had a better school environment, went to college, and doesn’t live in California.

BTW- Why do women teachers think that a guy can be kicked multiple times in the crouch on accident? Does any an out there believe that is even a thing?

Ano March 11, 2020 - 10:03 PM - 10:03 PM

My daughter went to a local private school, one of the ones close to Concord High. In 8th grade on the Washington DC trip she was sexually assaulted by 3 girls and a boy who snuck into the room. They recorded it and sent it over social media. When they returned and everything came out the police in both states were involved. The Concord police went to the principal and spoke with him . He denied it happened. Then they got all the kids phones which had the pictures and video of the assault and the police let him know. I have told as many people as I could so they can be aware. All 4 suspects went to Clayton Valley. My daughter went to Carondelet. It was amazing to see how both schools handled it. One denied and dried to brush under the rug . Carondelet rallied around my daughter and said how can we help . It says a lot about the compassion and honesty of the school.

Stuff is going to happen at every school it is how you respond that matters.

Nutcreek Frontier March 12, 2020 - 1:17 PM - 1:17 PM

At Ano, just so sorry that happened to your daughter…heart breaking that this kind of conduct was perpetrated by 14 year olds. I pray that she has had the strength to over-come this. I am very glad to hear that Carondelet supported her, wonderful to hear.

I was confused by one thing, you mention it happened on your daughter’s 8th grade trip, but that the suspects were in high school?

FPN March 11, 2020 - 10:29 PM - 10:29 PM

The problem is it’s not just at school anymore.

Stopbullying March 12, 2020 - 1:21 AM - 1:21 AM

I was bullied growing up in elementary, middle, and high schoolThe kids would shun me and refuse to talk to me, I would get called fat or dark.. the school did nothing. I remember the teachers even separated me and had me be alone during class/lunch/recess.. it really sucked.. I’d never want any child to feel how I felt..

West Leland March 12, 2020 - 9:32 AM - 9:32 AM

I read a post on Facebook where a woman beat her kid after she heard that she was being a bullying and said that “The cycle needs to end with us” not realizing she was being part of that cycle.

The strong picking on the weak is pretty much what defines bullying

Concernicus March 12, 2020 - 3:53 PM - 3:53 PM

Somebody gets it.

Mona Liza March 12, 2020 - 11:58 AM - 11:58 AM

My daughter went to Silverwood back in the day. Two boys bullied her everyday because she wore glasses. I went to the principle and was told my daughter was to blame because she verbally argued back at the boys. That was the only thing those teachers saw. They didn’t see or hear anything those boys said to her. I will NEVER forget how rotten those people were to me or my daughter and she is 45 years old now. Damn them all!

FED UP March 12, 2020 - 11:58 AM - 11:58 AM

Yes, our daughter was bullied, belittled, isolated, etc at Northgate. Our son went through and had few problems, but the girls were relentless. One would verbally attack and pressure the other girls in the group to isolate, spread rumors, etc. It was awful and she hated going to school…happened in organized sports too. She is much happier in college and is doing well……even sees some of these turkeys from time to time.

Ricardoh March 12, 2020 - 1:24 PM - 1:24 PM

Don’t give your kid pity. Teach them how to fight. It will keep them from being bullied the rest of their life.

FED UP March 12, 2020 - 1:31 PM - 1:31 PM

Easy to say until all your kids”Friends” side with the bully and she is on the outside. Kids just want to be accepted and have friends who have their back…unfortunately that now has turned into kids supporting bully’s instead of those being bullied in many cases…..
Yes, we tried various things, but if your kid goes to school and the 4-5 “friends” she’s had for years are spreading rumors and being mean….you’re supposed to do what? These are 15-18 year old kids……not ones that can be changed when younger…I still remember my daughter coming home and telling us that her friend of a couple years said she didn’t want to be her friend anymore because she wasn’t popular…..in 1st GRADE!! the girls mother thought it was funny…smh..

Ricardoh March 12, 2020 - 4:38 PM - 4:38 PM

FED UP I was thinking boys and much younger. Have no experience with bullying at that age. We had three sons and I think they could handle themselves pretty well. I can’t remember anyone at my HS getting bullied. I know girls can be vicious though.

If it was me I would find out what the rumors are and go from there.

Gittyup March 12, 2020 - 1:26 PM - 1:26 PM

I wore glasses from the age of about six and I was bullied all throughout school because of it. “Four eyes,” “Mr. Magoo,” “Boys don’t make passes at girls who wear glasses,” etc., etc., etc. It made me a stronger person. As of now, I could not care less what anybody else thinks of me. If they have a problem with it, it’s their problem, not mine. Bullying is as old as humanity. It is built into human DNA.

Silva March 12, 2020 - 1:28 PM - 1:28 PM

Bullying looks to me to be instinctual. It’s quite rampant in the animal kingdom. I don’t know anything about how schools do or don’t deal with it nowadays, but It’s awful that some children fear and dread waking up and facing each new day at school, knowing that they will be tortured. If adults at the school are made aware of it, I think they have a responsibility to put an end to it at school. The after affects of bullying can destroy a kid’s self esteem, make them feel completely powerless, and can last the rest of their lives.

The Fearless Spectator March 12, 2020 - 6:47 PM - 6:47 PM

There was a bully in my high school that wasn’t really that big. Yet he really knew how to fight. So I always tried to maintain a somewhat cordial relationship. I finally learned that the reason he was so good in a fight is that his Dad used to beat the hell out of him all the time. Probably a familiar scenario……


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