Beyond Claycord: Infant Locked in Car While Father Worked Found Dead

April 17, 2014 13:00 pm · 101 comments

This is beyond Claycord, but it’s a harsh reminder on how dangerous it is to leave your child in your vehicle. This also occurred in Concord a few years ago, so please read and pass this on to those with small children.

San Jose police are investigating the death of a 9-month-old boy who was locked in a vehicle while his father was working.

The father, who has not been identified, was supposed to drop off his son at a babysitter’s house before he went to work Wednesday morning but he forgot, San Jose police Sgt. Heather Randol said.

He parked his vehicle with the infant strapped in the car seat, Randol said.

The father discovered the boy unconscious in the vehicle at the end of the workday, according to Randol.

Police received a call at 7:14 p.m. about the unconscious infant, who was pronounced deceased a short time later, Randol said.

No arrests were made pending further investigation, she said.

1 J. April 17, 2014 at 1:00 PM

What a shame.

2 Dorothy April 17, 2014 at 1:08 PM

And no one noticed all day long?

3 ConcordGal April 17, 2014 at 1:13 PM

How do u forget your child Is In the car??No excuses….RIP precious Angel <3

4 CW April 17, 2014 at 1:24 PM

So sad! This was always one of my biggest fears after my maternity leave was over. I used to put my purse on the floor by my baby’s car seat to reduce the risk of forgetting about her.

5 wcmom April 17, 2014 at 1:31 PM

I will never, never, EVER understand this.

6 RIP❤️ April 17, 2014 at 1:34 PM

Where’s the mother? Why didn’t the person who was supposed to babysit call him/her to find out when they were coming etc.
RIP sweet baby

7 Guillermo Elenes April 17, 2014 at 1:36 PM

So sad. I have a little boy that is my life, and I always run around like a headless chicken.

I can only imagine the pain in this man’s heart, he was at work to provide now he has lost his child and the guilt must be overwhelming.

I pray that his actions were justifiable, not sure who it would serve if he was to be jailed.

8 The Grant April 17, 2014 at 1:39 PM

Stupid people should not be allowed to reproduce.

9 Idiocracy April 17, 2014 at 1:41 PM

Man, that is got to be the most irresponsible thing I’ve heard in weeks! Dude your a terrible father don’t mate ever again. That poor kid suffered! Jail time for you and sterilization.

10 Heartbroken April 17, 2014 at 1:48 PM

Every time it warms up I pray this doesn’t happen to
Anyone and yet it still does. I can’t understand.
It is very heartbreaking.

11 Calendar Girl April 17, 2014 at 1:50 PM

@CW,
How could you even think about “forgetting about her?” I don’t understand any mother needing to remind herself where her baby is by leaving her purse next to the infant. Scary times for our children…

12 sam April 17, 2014 at 1:51 PM

There are those humans, that harbor a resentment, having to bear the responsibility, for having to provide for a family member(s), these negative emotions can manifest themselves, into all forms of passive neglect and/or active abuse; “accident” or was it in fact, premeditated murder; the deep abiss of a human’s treachery is often times, very well concealed.

13 dmama April 17, 2014 at 1:52 PM

It would serve justice for this poor baby! I have NEVER “forgotten” my child in the car…such stupidity. Must have still been high and/or drunk from the night before to “forget” your kid…wow

14 Yhe Phantom April 17, 2014 at 1:55 PM

Guillermo Elenes

We can pray for him, the mother and the child.

Tears for all of them…

15 Michelle April 17, 2014 at 1:56 PM

No one should be in such a hurry to get to work to have something like this happen. RIP.

16 Anon777 April 17, 2014 at 1:59 PM

WCMom – Ditto – yet it happens again and again.

I guess nobody would ever take these precautions because you don’t think it would happen to you. Once it’s happened, I guess that mistake will never be made again.

These are especially good for someone who is not the routine drop off person:
*Put the diaper bag, baby toy, anything that reminds you of baby next to you in the car.
*Put your purse/briefcase (something you take to work) in the backseat next to the baby.
*Put a bottle/sippy cup next to your coffee mug in the car.
*Have a standing agreement with your daycare that if baby doesn’t show up by whatever time have the daycare a parent.
*Set an alarm on your phone as you leave your house for one hour.

17 Jack Jones April 17, 2014 at 1:59 PM

Listen up y’all.

There is no excuse for this. Cry me a river. Send this irresponsible jag off to the chair. Make sure big bubba bounds his bubble butt before.

What a shame. Poor kid.

18 GoGo Gomez April 17, 2014 at 2:02 PM

RIP

19 Cliff Borba April 17, 2014 at 2:07 PM

This guy is a special sort of stupid.

20 anon April 17, 2014 at 2:08 PM

How could he forget after putting the baby in the car seat? What was he thinking about?

21 @ConcordGal April 17, 2014 at 2:13 PM

It’s easy to understand how somebody could have a morning routine and something that isn’t normally a part of it can be overlooked, especially before one’s morning coffee.

Several times, I’ve forgotten to drive by the post office in the morning and mail a letter, even though it was sitting on my front seat. It just isn’t a normal part of my routine.

Obviously, in my example, nobody got hurt. But my point is still valid.

22 Mac April 17, 2014 at 2:15 PM

I hope they gave this Dad a drug test.
Sounds like he smoked his lunch, and spaced out.

How do you forget your son ?

That is beyond stupid.

23 Shiloh April 17, 2014 at 2:23 PM

Most of you are heartless fools. You have ALL gotten in the car and started driving the way you are used to going instead of where you are supposed to go. We live in a busy, busy time where we all have more on our minds than we can really handle. I am guessing that this father isn’t the one who usually drops the baby off so it wasn’t part of his routine and, yes, the baby was probably sleeping in a rear facing car seat. It CAN happen, and not just to “useless idiots who shouldn’t reproduce”. Leaving something important (that you’re used to carrying with you) in the back seat with the baby is a fantastic idea. I have heard of people who keep a giant stuffed animal in the baby’s car seat — when they put the baby in the seat they move the stuffed animal to the front seat. Take any precaution you can – I know all of the commenters above are perfect parents and just downright perfect human beings, but maybe the rest of us can learn something from this.

24 So Sad April 17, 2014 at 2:48 PM

We live in a hurry up and rush world. I could see how this might have happen if he is not the one to take the baby to daycare everyday. There has been several times when I make oatmeal in the morning and have to turn back around and drive back home to make sure I turn the tea pot off.
I think parents need to put their work bag in the back seat by the baby seat.
My heart goes out to this family

25 bz April 17, 2014 at 2:52 PM

Shiloh,
Thank you for your words of wisdom. I am not a mother however I do suffer from medical problems that cause forgetfulness. I fear i would end up doing this one day, especially if it were not part of my normal routine. “Forgetting” doesn’t mean you dont love the person or harbor any negative feelings towards them. All of us have been on auto pilot before. So I choose not to judge but pray for the family especially the father who will most likely habor unspeakable guilt till the day he die which will be far worse than any punishment we could ever inflict.

26 PO'd April 17, 2014 at 2:54 PM

How f___ing stupid can you get? There is NO excuse for not knowing that the child is in the car, particularly when it is usually the driver who fastens the child in the safety seat in the first place!! Dad had all day to remember and correct his gross error, but didn’t. Shiloh@24-Why are you an apologist for the ultimate in irresponsibility? Unbelievable!!

27 David April 17, 2014 at 3:01 PM

Thank you Shiloh #24. Well said. It’s an awful tragedy. I hope the father and family can find solace.

28 Suzanne April 17, 2014 at 3:28 PM

Anon @17,
If you have to go through all of that just to remind yourself that you have a child in the car, then you do not need one and should never, ever have any.

29 anonanonagain April 17, 2014 at 3:35 PM

There isn’t a minute that goes by that my child is either on my mind or is in the back of my mind.
Perhaps this was out of his normal routine, but how could you forget that you are the one responsible for you child getting to their destination??
What about child care?? Did they call to find out why the baby was absent? This is so sad and preventable. So many children each year die at the hands of their supposed loved ones by either abuse of neglect……

30 I'm Your Huckleberry April 17, 2014 at 3:35 PM

Let’s all admit we have been forgetful of many things in our lives. If you “forget” to mail your mortgage payment or credit cards bills on time, you’ll get charged a late fee. If you “forget” to pay your property taxes on time, you’ll get a penalty. If you “forget” to pay your income taxes, you’ll not only get penalized, but could eventually go to prison. Most of us have even been guilty of “forgetting” an appointment we have scheduled on our calendars. We’re just all so busy, running around like chickens with our heads cut off.

At some point you have a revelation, a light bulb goes off, and you realized you “forgot” to do any of the things I listed above. I’m trying to understand how he didn’t come to realize and “remember” he had his little boy in the back seat until the end of the day when he left to go home.

31 CVCHS Mom April 17, 2014 at 3:47 PM

Thank you for saying exactly what I was thinking Shiloh. I love my children with all that I am, but life gets crazy and we have so much on our minds, I can EASILY see this happening. I pray for the father and the family.

32 Adriana April 17, 2014 at 3:51 PM

There is no one to blame. It is indeed hard to imagine how this could happen, but it does. Work, kids, school, stress, LIFE! Prayers to the entire family for peace & forgiveness.

33 No excuses April 17, 2014 at 3:51 PM

There is no excuse for this sort of tragedy. People put themselves first, its the way of society these days. This child paid the price. The parents pay for ever.

Rest in peace little one. You are in a better place.

34 VeryUnfortunate April 17, 2014 at 3:52 PM

Not sure how this happens, but this is a very tragic mistake. May this poor child RIP and the father find a way to forgive himself.

35 Connie Dobbs April 17, 2014 at 4:04 PM

Disable the airbag and put the baby in the front seat, since a crash seems less likely than accidentally baking them.

36 ConcordGal April 17, 2014 at 4:10 PM

@Comment #22
Forgetting your child In the car Is not like,forgetting to mail a letter!!The fact that u are even comparing the two Is ridiculous …..I have forgot items at the store,to pick things up,to mail something off,but In my entire life I have never forgot my children In the car sleeping or not!!I dont care what this mans reason or excuse Is….a 9mo old child Is now In heaven and probably suffered a horrible death being In a boiling car all day because of his fathers neglect and idiocy!!There Is never an excuse In the world that would ever justify that to me!!!

37 sam April 17, 2014 at 4:20 PM

THANK YOU PO’d, #27, This is one of the cleaver tools employed by apathetic people, ie, engaging the perspective of “the Devil’s advocate”; I guarentee you, if this “father” had been responsible for the death of, any one of these, “Devil’s advocate” people, their well chosen vernacular, of detached indifference would be replaced with screams of, “OFF WITH THIS MURDER’S HEAD.”

38 TinFoiler April 17, 2014 at 4:25 PM

“…but he forgot”.
You know ~ pets, kids, laptops, backpacks – All of those throw away things that Consumers always seem to forget about.
SAD

39 Mustang Sally April 17, 2014 at 4:28 PM

It never happened to me, I can gladly say. I however CAN understand how it could happen. Some of us are stretched past our limits. My heart goes out to everyone involved. Especially that poor man.

Thanks, Mayor for the important reminder.

40 Mamatosix April 17, 2014 at 4:45 PM

Yes CVCHS Mom!
This is a horrible tragedy. And we all are so busy. Unfortunately I could see it happening too. And there is no turning back the clock after work.
This poor father/family are going to serve a life sentence already.
So sad.

41 NO MORE EXCUSES!!!! LETS MAKE A POINT WITH THIS LOOSER!!! April 17, 2014 at 4:46 PM

Do we let him off because he is to stupid????

Do we let him off because he could not handle the pressure?????

Hey lets ask CONGRESS I mean other stupid people what we should do about this!!!!!!

Enough making excuses….

People GROW THE H-E-L-L UP!!!!!!

42 Mamasgirl April 17, 2014 at 5:10 PM

This is a horrible tragedy and samity needs to be brought back into this world, but how could this have been done easily?

43 Me April 17, 2014 at 5:38 PM

A lot of harsh comments. Unfortunely this is a story we hear every year. Sleep deprived parents that leave their babies in the car. What we need is a solution. Have the car sound a screaming alarm if someone tries to lock the doors of a car while their is life in the car.

44 Me April 17, 2014 at 5:41 PM

Oops, ‘there’ not ‘their’

45 anonanonagain April 17, 2014 at 6:02 PM

I can’t believe that people are saying that they could see this happening?? Comparing forgetting to make the mortgage payment or mail the check is not like forgetting to leave your child in a car all day. You are talking about a human life, your flesh and blood. Like someone said, he had to strap the baby in his car seat. How could you forget your child after going through the morning ritual and getting them in the car??? I can’t even begin to comprehend………

46 anonymous April 17, 2014 at 6:04 PM

My heart goes out to the family..I can understand how it can happen, if its out of your normal routine, or sleep deprived. Yes it is tragic, that poor little angel. But you don’t know what was going on in his life or head don’t be so judgmental v I’m sure he probably also thought would never happen to him until it did.. I’m surprised the babysitter didn’t call to find out where the baby was. .. Please please anyone with small children or taking care of small children, check your back seat, put your purse, phone, briefcase or any other essential in the back seat to prevent this from happening to another child.

47 Atticus Thraxx April 17, 2014 at 6:06 PM

You people are some heartless bastards. Everything from the guys a druggy to he secretly wanted to murder his baby…… how do you people live with such dark souls?A healthy community who try and support this family thru unimaginable horror. A pox on all your houses! Thraxx out. You sicken me.

48 ChampagneKitty April 17, 2014 at 6:23 PM

to No More Excuses #42–“We” have not yet decided whether any charges will be filed. (the district attorney)

to Jack Jones #18–Obviously this is a terrible t-e-r-r-i-b-l-e TERRIBLE tragedy. However, if charges will even be filed against the father, he would not be eligible for the death penalty. This was a crime of negligence, not of intent.

What a horrible thing to happen. May the baby rest in peace.

49 Jess April 17, 2014 at 6:28 PM

I can easily understand how this could happen. I had two young children who had different day care arrangements. One had different arrangements depending on the day of the week. Both my husband and I had demanding jobs with schedules that varied. Some days one or the other of us had early meetings or meetings that ran late in the day. We both had stretches of time where we were on call 24/7. We were dead dog tired. Some days I dropped off and picked up. Some days my husband did. It depended on our schedules each day. Every once in a while I would forget I had to pick up a child and would have to call and apologize for being late to pick up. I’m sure my husband and I weren’t alone in having complicated daycare arrangements and complicated lives with two young children. It would have been very easy to go to work, forgetting that a sleeping child was in the car.

50 Typical response ! April 17, 2014 at 6:38 PM

Vitriol and sanctimonious condemnation.
This could be a good person that was a new
parent that made a horrible mistake, or a drugged
out loser. Judgement from idiots and mean
spirited wanna be tuff guys(gals).
Par for the course here with the regulars,
but you to will someday find yourselves in
some similar situation and I hope you have the
same judgement passed to you.

51 Kelly April 17, 2014 at 6:45 PM

I give this guy no excuse. He should be aware of his children at all times. He needs serious jail time for this.

52 Walnut Creek Resident April 17, 2014 at 7:15 PM

We should all keep that father of that child in our prayers. This is obviously a terrible accident and mistake. None of us are above this. So please show mercy and forgiveness for this poor father. Can you imagine if this happened to you. I can recall there was the same thing that happened to another father a few years ago. It is because you do the same thing over and over, dropping the kid off to day care, get back in the car, go to work.. so you forget a day thinking it was done the day before. Maybe you had a sleepless night and your memory is foggy. Who knows? So so sorry.

53 Momo April 17, 2014 at 7:20 PM

There is still a big difference between forgetting who is picking up and leaving your child in the car. While I feel terrible for this family I don’t understand how it happens. We are all rushed when we go to work. We all have things on our minds as we start our day. We have all forgotten our coffee or briefcase or whatever. But those things are not our child. I have never forgotten that my babies were in the car no matter where or what I was doing

54 Randy April 17, 2014 at 7:38 PM

These reactions say a lot more about the individuals than they do about the situation.

Read this Pulitzer Prize winning article piece from 2010. It is worth your time.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/02/27/AR2009022701549.html?wpisrc=newsletter&sid=ST2009030602446

55 CW April 17, 2014 at 7:40 PM

I didn’t say that it was a rational fear. I had an hour-long commute back when my oldest was a baby and the daycare was 2 doors down from my office. At some point I had seen a media account of a tragedy similar to the one that happened in San Jose and I was scared of that happening to me. Better to be paranoid and leave my purse on the floor unnecessarily than not do it and risk a dead baby.

56 sam April 17, 2014 at 8:07 PM

If, this child had been your child, this “father” “mistakenly” left in the car, for hours to die, you would be screaming “bloody murder”… oh yea… that’s right, it wasn’t your child he left in the car, it was his, so, “it’s all good”, so let’s all convey our deepest of sympathies, to this “father” for his loss; sins of omission or sin of commission, ie, THIS CHILD WAS KILLED.

57 Sirena April 17, 2014 at 8:11 PM

I’m sorry but who forgets a baby in the car. As a mother the one thing that is always on my mind are my children. I don’t care if I have a million things going on in a day the first thing on my mind are my children. You shouldn’t be a parent if you think, ” accidents happen”! Or the lame excuse that I usually don’t have my kids on this day so I forgot them in the car. The poor baby had to suffer for his stupid dad’s actions! Pathetic parent and should have never had a child! Poor excuse for a father!!!!

58 Sirena April 17, 2014 at 8:19 PM

All of the people that say this can easily happen should not being caring for a child! If your demanding jobs take priority over your children and their welfare you shouldn’t have children! It’s that simple. You obviously are so wrapped up in your own self to care for someone else!

59 Michelle April 17, 2014 at 8:33 PM

WCR is right, this did happen a few years ago. This is sad indeed that it should happen again. Rest People! and things like this won’t happen! Many prayers to this father.

60 @Sirena April 17, 2014 at 9:06 PM

You are an idiot.

Nobody said it’s ok that it happened. But the people who understand how a tragedy like this can happen are much smarter than you, since you find it incomprehensible. Understanding how things can happen is a giant step toward preventing them. Or, one can use your approach (stick your head up your butt and pretend that only bad parents can make mistakes). Which do you think is more effective?

61 Sam Y April 17, 2014 at 9:18 PM

Atticus..I totally agree with you (this time)…LOL These people on here are so mean sometimes. I cant believe that they are all PERFECT! Have compassion people for this poor father who will have to carry this horrible burden with him the rest of his life( and before you go saying that the child will never get to live his life, I know! and its sad!) but to say horrible things about this man that you don’t even know is wrong!!! Try saying a prayer for the child’s mother and FATHER instead of judging!

62 Rose Garden April 17, 2014 at 9:41 PM

This is so sad. A horrible tragedy.

Praying for the family……

63 D April 17, 2014 at 9:50 PM

Everyone keeps talking about the dad…I feel horrible for the mom. She is the one that is going to be living with guilt and regret the rest of her life. RIP beautiful boy.

64 AWWWWW COME ON PEOPLE THIS WAS NO ACCIDENT!!!! April 17, 2014 at 10:20 PM

Do you really think he left that kid in the car by accident?

ARE YOU ALL FRIKEN KIDDING ME….

WOW I HAVE TO GET OUT OF THIS STATE!!!!!

65 ChampagneKitty April 17, 2014 at 10:26 PM

to #65–Yes. I really think that he left that kid in the car by accident. No, I am not kidding you. Yes, maybe you do need to get out of this state. And while you’re working on that, stop spreading false rumors.

66 ??? April 17, 2014 at 11:00 PM

I agree with atticus thraxx.

67 ChampagneKitty April 17, 2014 at 11:08 PM

Channel 7 is reporting that the father will be facing charges for this, but I didn’t hear them say which charges…

68 dmama April 18, 2014 at 7:18 AM

@ Sirena…I completely agree!!!

69 Silva April 18, 2014 at 7:56 AM

Just so so sad for all. Prayers and support for that poor family. They will always live with this horrible burden, and no penalty imposed on the father will be as harsh as the pain that will come from within.

70 Shiloh April 18, 2014 at 7:57 AM

Syrena: I don’t value my job more than my children. In fact, I don’t have a job because I chose to stay home and be with my own beloved children all day long every day. I have never forgotten my children in the car or anywhere else. What happens to me quite often is that I forget that I DONT have my children. If the baby is with grandma and I’m driving around I will get a panicky feeling every time I glance in the rear view and see the empty car seat “Where’s the baby??!! Oh yeah, she’s with grandma”. BUT, as I mentioned earlier, I have gone into “auto pilot” many times and started driving to the baseball fields (where I spend a lot of my time) instead of to my actual destination. And like someone else said, I will drive right past the bank or post office or wherever because I have so much on my mind. I think forgetting a baby is more likely to happen to a man in the morning on a work day because of the way men are wired. When my husband wakes up on a work day he is all business. His mind is already on the million things he has to do and the meetings he will attend, etc, and it is usually true that men don’t multitask as naturally as women do. I know this will ruffle some feathers and there are some men who multitask quite well, but I am speaking in general terms. How many of us have reminded our husbands of something very important five times as they were leaving the house and they still drove off to work and forgot??! This man is not a murderer, he is a man who made a horrible mistake and I feel miserable for him and have already prayed for him several times and will continue to as I’m sure he will be on my mind for a while.

71 Puddintain April 18, 2014 at 8:34 AM

Familiar troll here. It’s trying to toy with our emotions. Again.

72 Lime Ridge April 18, 2014 at 8:35 AM

The shiny silver lining of this tragedy is that it gives lots of people an opportunity to talk about what great parents they are.

73 Mustang Sally April 18, 2014 at 8:41 AM

Shiloh, intelligent and thoughtful people, and those with life experience do understand what you’re saying. Some folks are just too full of themselves not to throw stones.

74 PO'd April 18, 2014 at 9:54 AM

It is really unbelievable how many people can see how this could happen. Yes it is a horrible tragedy, one that is impossible to heal from.Probably will end in divorce. Could lead to horrible consequences later, and for the rest of his life, he has to live with this.I get that.I also understand that people are busy, busy, busy, and having too much on your mind can alter otherwise normal behavior. We’ve all forgotten something somewhere-ask my wife! I’m always looking for my cell phone.
BUT. It is INEXCUSABLE!! When I drove my kids around, I changed my driving habits because my kids were in the car-I was far more defensive.I had the most important “cargo” I will ever have in the back seat.My wife was even more protective. She knew where the kids were and what they were doing at all times.ALWAYS. There is no room for error.There are no excuses any apologist can utter that is a possible scenario.It is the same as letting your kids run crazy in the store or restaurant. It is NEGLECT. Plain and simple.
This guy was criminally negligent and needs to pay for it. Based on responses here,however, we can expect another tragedy soon.

75 Anon and like it April 18, 2014 at 10:45 AM

Thankfully, there are people in the world who look for REAL solutions, rather than those who think that their criticizing is solving a problem.

I discovered that NASA has developed what they call a Child Presence Sensor that is scheduled to come out this year. This may be another idea that will be able to be used.

Here is a summary of it’s capabilities:
“The Child Presence Sensor driver alarm, designed to hang on the driver’s key ring, sounds ten warning beeps if the driver moves too far away from the vehicle. If the driver doesn’t return within one minute, the alarm will beep continuously and cannot be turned off until it is reset by returning to the child safety seat.

The sensor switch triggers immediately when a child is placed in the seat and deactivates when the child is removed. The switch has a large activation area with a sensitivity of about eight ounces. The sensor detects weight once the child is placed in the seat, transmitting a unique code to the driver-alarm module via a radio-frequency link. The system incorporates a long-life battery for reliability. If the battery is low, the system alerts the driver with an audible alarm.”

76 Shelly April 18, 2014 at 11:29 AM

@#76, BRILLIANT!!!!

77 Anon and like it April 18, 2014 at 12:01 PM

Thanks, Shelly! And the device will be ONLY $25…YAY!

78 Jess April 18, 2014 at 12:40 PM

Randy @#55,

Thank you for posting the link to the amazing article about parents who have forgotten their children were the car, leading to their deaths. I urge everyone to read it.

The author talked to many parents who had done this and investigated many cases. He makes the point that parents who do this are just like the rest of us. It happens to both rich and poor, educated and uneducated, mothers and fathers, the forgetful and the super-organized. They were loving parents and good people, just like the rest of us. The author explains the neurobiology that allows this to happen. He explains how a parent can drive to work forgetting to drop a child off at daycare, then go through the entire day believing their child is safe at daycare.

He also explains the phenomenon that we see here on this blog, the vitriol that rains down on the parent who made this tragic mistake. It’s not unique to this blog. The same type of hateful and cruel comments appear online whenever this happens anywhere. The author talked to a psychologist who had done research on why people react this way. Here is the explanation directly from the article:

“Humans, Hickling said, have a fundamental need to create and maintain a narrative for their lives in which the universe is not implacable and heartless, that terrible things do not happen at random, and that catastrophe can be avoided if you are vigilant and responsible.

In hyperthermia cases, he believes, the parents are demonized for much the same reasons. “We are vulnerable, but we don’t want to be reminded of that. We want to believe that the world is understandable and controllable and unthreatening, that if we follow the rules, we’ll be okay. So, when this kind of thing happens to other people, we need to put them in a different category from us. We don’t want to resemble them, and the fact that we might is too terrifying to deal with. So, they have to be monsters.”

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/02/27/AR2009022701549_5.html?wpisrc=newsletter&sid=ST2009030602446

79 NatureGirl April 18, 2014 at 2:01 PM

I have nothing but compassion for this father. He is living in his own personal hell right now, and I cannot imagine how horrible he feels. He certainly does not need the criticism of a society to make him feel worse about what he did (or didn’t do).

I am eternally thankful that my son was cared for in our home for the first 18 months. He slept horribly, and I was a complete walking zombie. I often felt I was walking a thin line between barely hanging on and losing it all.

The article mentioned above is a long read, but it does an excellent job of explaining how these things happen. The bottom line is, no matter how much you condemn someone else for this happening, it could still happen to you. None of the people in that article thought they would ever forget their baby in the car. Yet, it happened.

It’s a horrible tragedy, and I feel sorry that anyone has to experience this. My heart goes out to the family and of course to the baby, and I hope that they can find peace eventually.

80 Angelface April 18, 2014 at 4:42 PM

There but for the grace of God go I.

81 Sirena is correct...and most of YOU are the real idiots April 19, 2014 at 2:13 AM

I think that most of you people here who are defending this father hopefully NEVER, EVER ,EVER have the blessing to care for small infants.

When you are a parent, you first priority is to take care of your child, then other things in your life. This guy should have been thinking about getting his child to the babysitter’s place the whole time he was driving. then this would not have happened. end of story.

At to the moron of the day- post #61:

Get a life before you attack someone else. Sirena is not the fool like you who tries to justify and explain stupid behavior of clueless parents. A child is dead. It doesn’t help to conduct some useless root cause analysis study after a tragedy like this happens. someone who leaves their child is a car for 8 hours is a moron. so maybe you are the one with their head up the butt.

And just to be fair, I am not a parent. yet. I have made the decision not to have children right now, because I don’t feel like I can assume the great responsibility of caring for one. The only thing that people can learn from this incident is that caring for a child is something that most people are not ready for in our society.

82 I think that #65 may have a valid point April 19, 2014 at 2:19 AM

Yes, i can see where #65 is coming from:

Parent is stressed out at work, and at home, wife is constantly abusing him about not being a good husband, good father, blah, blah,blah…

I can easily see how some fickle person can easily get stressed with responsibility of caring for a child. Then of course the child is “accidentally”
left in the car, while the father of the year goes to work.

This is why we have something call “gross negligence” in our legal system.

83 @82 (Sirena) April 19, 2014 at 6:56 AM

I’m glad you don’t have kids. Now stop talking to yourself and patting yourself on the back.

84 Silva April 19, 2014 at 11:27 AM

Randy(55), and Jess(79); Superb article, it goes a long way explaining how yes, it could happen to anyone. I too would recommend reading it to help understand how. Especially those who think they are so flawless, and it would NEVER happen to them!

Anyway, soon (hopefully) there will be a real solution to this horrible problem. (#76)!! YAY!!!

85 @jess..he is a monster April 19, 2014 at 12:58 PM

Nice psychological bs…now get back to your prescription pad and make big pharma some more cash!

This guy is a monster for “forgetting” to take his baby out of the car…coming from someone who has been trying to conceive for 3 years I can’t tell you how upset it makes me when I hear stories of child neglect….it is plain not fair that some people who are blessed with children end up taking their little angels for granted.

If you’re saying that what this guy did was not monstrous than you need to have your head checked!

86 Get Real April 19, 2014 at 12:59 PM

There is a real solution to this horrible problem. RESPONSIBILITY!

A lot of people shouldn’t be parents.

You can have compassion and pray for this family. But if you defend him (or any parent who does this), you’re as illogical and irresponsible as he is. Or any parent who does this.

The truth hurts.

87 CW April 19, 2014 at 2:47 PM

“This guy should have been thinking about getting his child to the babysitter’s place the whole time he was driving.”

Obviously you’ve never had a long commute. Nobody is going to spend a hour+ thinking only about a single topic (even one as important as your child).

88 Puddintain April 19, 2014 at 4:48 PM

Hi TROLL! I see you. (86, 87, etc.)

89 To the Troll/post #82 who thinks i am Sirena April 19, 2014 at 7:31 PM

Sorry to disappoint you post #82, but i am not Sirena. If you actually applied some reading comprehension skills to good use you would note that she said she was a mother; i am not. nice try, though.

But i am guessing you are the one with no friends who is posting different random trollish comments. I am also guessing you are related to the chicken-hawk post #61 who called Sirena an idiot as well. Please do us all a favor and get off the computer before your mom finds out and you get into trouble.

90 @Puddintain April 19, 2014 at 7:33 PM

HELLO TURD….I CAN SEE YOU!!!

91 @Puddintain April 19, 2014 at 9:42 PM

That’s funny I’m a Concord girl, not a troll. I think it’s time you go back under your bridge now though!!
-#86

92 Cowellian April 19, 2014 at 9:56 PM

Sure, it could happen to anyone. Except it doesn’t. But there are an awful lot of people who are willing to excuse the inexcusable.

93 Shiloh April 19, 2014 at 10:02 PM

Please read the article linked above!! Everyone, please!!

94 @90 (Sirena) April 19, 2014 at 10:46 PM

I’m sure you couldn’t possibly change your story so you don’t appear to be the same person. That would amount to (GASP!) dishonesty on the internet.

95 @Cowellian April 20, 2014 at 12:26 AM
96 Cowellian April 20, 2014 at 6:55 AM

I think people are putting a lot of time and money into trying to excuse the inexcusable.

97 Puddintain April 20, 2014 at 8:00 AM

@#92, My mistake and please accept my apologies. That thing at #86 & #91 had me seeing red again.

98 Puddintain April 20, 2014 at 8:03 AM

Woops! Did it again! Make that the thing at #87 & #91.

99 Silva April 20, 2014 at 9:41 AM

Cowellian, did you really read the article? Here’s the link to the first page;

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/02/27/AR2009022701549_5.html?wpisrc=newsletter&sid=ST2009030602446

100 Cowellian April 20, 2014 at 12:03 PM

Silva, it’s pretty evident that I won’t be able to change your opinion, so I shan’t waste the effort. But yes, I have read the article, and I’ve already stated my opinion about it.
Pax
Cowellian

101 Silva April 20, 2014 at 8:45 PM

Cowellian, I just wondered. Pax to you too!

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